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February 17, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Hillary Clinton Wants To Accomplish On Her Trip Overseas

10 Exchange U.S. dollars for currency that's worth something

9 Win respect defeating Japan's top-ranked sumo wrestler

8 Shift world's perception of America from "hated" to "extremely disliked"

7 Personally thank all of her illegal campaign donors

6 Three words: stylish Indonesian pantsuits

5 Visit burial site of revered Chinese military leader, General Tso

4 Get drunk with that Japanese finance minister guy

3 Convince China to switch from lead-tainted products to mercury-tainted products

2 Catch Chinese screening of Benjamin Button entitled "The Strange Adventures of Freaky Grandpa Baby"

1 Pick up carton of duty-free smokes for Obama

February 16, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Abraham lincoln Would Say If He Were Alive Today

10 "Sup?"

9 "I see Madonna's still a slut"

8 "Who's that handsome sumbitch on the five?"

7 "Is that free Grand Slam deal still going on at Denny's?"

6 "I just changed my Facebook status update to, Tthe 'ol rail splitter is chillaxing'"

5 "How do I get on 'Dancing with the Stars'?"

4 "Okay, Obama, you're from Illinois, too. We get it!"

3 "Hey Phelps, don't Bogart the weed!"

2 "What's the deal with Joaquin Phoenix?"

1 "A Broadway play? Uhhh, no thanks. I'm good."

January 28, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard at the Meeting Between Barack Obama and the Republicans

10 "I miss the Clinton administration when we'd meet at Hooters"

9 "Can we wrap this up? I've got tickets to the 4:30 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop"

8 "Smoke break!"

7 "You fellas really need to take it easy on the Old Spice"

6 "Mr. President: don't misunderestimate the Republicans"

5 "Another smoke break!"

4 "What was the deal with Aretha Franklin's hat?"

3 "About that tax the rich stuff -- you were joking, right?"

2 "Sir, it's refreshing to have a Chief Executive who speaks in complete sentences"

1 "Senator Craig's offering his stimulus package in the men's room"

January 27, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Ways Rod Blagojevich Can Improve His Image

10 Star in new television series, "America's Funniest Haircuts"

9 Quit politics and become a fat, lovable mall cop

8 Start pronouncing last name with Jerry Lewis-like "BLAGOOOYYYJEVICH"

7 Offer a senate seat with no money down, zero percent interest

6 Team up with John Malkovich and Erin Brockovich for hot Malkovich-Brockovich-Blagojevich sex tape

5 Change his name to Barod Obamavich

4 Safely land an Airbus on the Hudson River

3 I don't know...how about showing up for his impeachment trial?

2 Wear sexy dresses, high heels and say, "You Betcha!"

1 Uhhh...resign?

January 16, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Signs Obama's Getting Nervious

10 New slogan: "Yes we can... or maybe not, it's hard to say"

9 In moment of confusion, requested a $300 billion bailout from the bailout industry

8 He's up to not smoking three packs a day

7 Friends say he's looking frail, shaky and...no, that's McCain

6 He's so stressed, doctors say he's developing a Sanjay in his Gupta

5 Been walking around muttering, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

4 Offered Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, $100,000 to buy his old Senate seat back

3 Standing on White House roof screaming, "Save us, Superman!"

2 Sweating like Bill Clinton when Hillary comes home early

1 He demanded a recount

January 8, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Barack Obama Plans To Fix The Economy

10 Encourage tourists to throw spare change in the Grand Canyon

9 End our dependence on foreign owls

8 Sell New Mexico to Mexico

7 Put a little of that bailout money on the Ravens plus 3 at Tennessee. Come on! It's a mortal lock!

6 Rent out the moon for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs

5 Lotto our way out of this son-of-a-bitch

4 Appear on "Deal or No Deal" and hope to choose the right briefcase

3 Bail out the adult film industry -- not sure how it helps, but it can't hurt

2 Release O.J. from prison, have him steal America's money from China

1 Stop talkin' and start Obama-natin'!

January 7, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard At The Presidents' Lunch

10 "Sorry, you're not on the list, Mr. Gore"

9 "If Hillary calls, I've been here since Monday"

8 "Laura! More Mountain Dew!"

7 "You guys wanna see, 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop'?"

6 "Call the nurse -- George swallowed a napkin ring!"

5 "Hey Barack, wanna go with us to Cabo in March? Oh that's right, you have to work!"

4 "Kissey kissey"

3 "Obama? I think he's downstairs smoking a butt"

2 "Did you ever see a monkey sneezing?"

1 "I hope Clinton's unbuckling his belt because he's full"

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State Of The Union: IPad Versus IPoo

Last night Barack Obama waterboarded the nation with another baroque flood of words. We immediately thought of the abused citizens of Indonesia who want to rid themselves of the very recently (only a month) placed statue of the “One” (termer). Those Indonesians sound very like Americans:

Members of the “Take Down the Barack Obama [...]

Tough Times Ahead For Hillary Clinton Supporters

As we wrote yesterday, there will be tough times ahead for Hillary Clinton supporters. The tough times will come because in order to do what is best for the country and to resurrect the now dead Democratic Party of FDR and Hillary Clinton we will have to assist in the destruction of the Obama [...]

Scott Brown Is Man Of The Year

Time magazine’s “Man of the Year 2008″ and “Man of the Year 2009″ are in Chappaquiddick-like brackish waters due to Scott Brown. As of January, Scott Brown is without doubt “Man of the Year 2010″.

Time magazine’s love struck editors (“Obama is a god!” exclaimed Newsweek’s Evan Thomas) chose their idol, Barack Obama, as “Man [...]

Forget The Obama Job Summit Publicity Stunt – We Need More Unemployment

Two days ago Barack Obama exploited U.S. Military Academy at West Point cadets as stage props for a publicity stunt. As of today confusion reigns over Obama’s escalation to retreat speech. Yesterday, testifying before the Armed Services Committee, Hillary Clinton and Robert Gates (as well as Admiral Mullen of the Joint Chiefs) stated [...]

Barack Obama’s Fever Nightmare: Hillary Clinton

We were all set to finally publish our discussion of Item 10 today. We mentioned Item 10 in our article The World Series: The Hillary Clinton Coalition Versus The Barack Obama Coalition, Part III The discussion of Item 10 will be the focus of the first installment in a multi-part series we will publish regularly [...]

Bullets Fly In The Democratic Civil War

The latest abortion fight on health care reminds us of how we got to this point in America – with “progressives” claiming women must once again suffer for the “greater good”. The fake, “progressives in name only” (PINOs), with their lurid arguments against equality still denigrate women in order to promote and protect Barack [...]

Horses, Women, Healthcare, Gays, Dimocrats, Beasts, And George W.

Yesterday, 3,000 miles from Washington, in California, a mare by the name of Zenyatta became the first female horse to win the most prestigious race in horse racing – The Breeders’ Cup. So spectacular was Zenyatta that now there is the very high possibility that she will be named Horse of the Year for [...]

The World Series: The Hillary Clinton Coalition Versus The Barack Obama Coalition, Part III

Big Media, but mostly Big Blogs and the Big Blog Boys are in full Obama protection mode. Let’s spell out for them briefly what yesterday was about. Here is a top ten for the sad, Lettermanesque Big Blog Boys:

1. Obama is the kiss of death. Obama has tried to create the impression [...]

The World Series: The Hillary Clinton Coalition Versus The Barack Obama Coalition, Part II

Update: Confusion reigns among Obama supporters. At FireDogLake and the DailyKooks they are purposefully confusing the Democratic “base” with the Obama coalition. We wrote about the

Where I Dissent

It’s not only Lynn Forester – a lot of people are just beginning to discover we are right when we say:

Obama simply cannot be trusted. Obama cannot be trusted on any issue. Obama cannot be trusted by his friends. Obama cannot be trusted by his enemies. Obama cannot be trusted.

Democrat Brent Budowsky (an aide [...]