Archives:

Categories:

Presidential Seal

Get a Hillary Is 44 button! Here's How:

Please Send a Donation to us at Hillary Is 44 So We Can Continue Our Work. Donate $10.00 or more and we will send you a pink Hillary Is 44 button.

Get a Hillary Is 44 T-Shirt! Here's How:

Donate $100.00 or more and we will send you a pink Hillary Is 44 T-shirt as well as a button.

Donate To Hillary Is 44 below:


Suscribe To Our RSS Feed

The Funnies

See Our Funnies Archive.

February 17, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Hillary Clinton Wants To Accomplish On Her Trip Overseas

10 Exchange U.S. dollars for currency that's worth something

9 Win respect defeating Japan's top-ranked sumo wrestler

8 Shift world's perception of America from "hated" to "extremely disliked"

7 Personally thank all of her illegal campaign donors

6 Three words: stylish Indonesian pantsuits

5 Visit burial site of revered Chinese military leader, General Tso

4 Get drunk with that Japanese finance minister guy

3 Convince China to switch from lead-tainted products to mercury-tainted products

2 Catch Chinese screening of Benjamin Button entitled "The Strange Adventures of Freaky Grandpa Baby"

1 Pick up carton of duty-free smokes for Obama

February 16, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Abraham lincoln Would Say If He Were Alive Today

10 "Sup?"

9 "I see Madonna's still a slut"

8 "Who's that handsome sumbitch on the five?"

7 "Is that free Grand Slam deal still going on at Denny's?"

6 "I just changed my Facebook status update to, Tthe 'ol rail splitter is chillaxing'"

5 "How do I get on 'Dancing with the Stars'?"

4 "Okay, Obama, you're from Illinois, too. We get it!"

3 "Hey Phelps, don't Bogart the weed!"

2 "What's the deal with Joaquin Phoenix?"

1 "A Broadway play? Uhhh, no thanks. I'm good."

January 28, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard at the Meeting Between Barack Obama and the Republicans

10 "I miss the Clinton administration when we'd meet at Hooters"

9 "Can we wrap this up? I've got tickets to the 4:30 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop"

8 "Smoke break!"

7 "You fellas really need to take it easy on the Old Spice"

6 "Mr. President: don't misunderestimate the Republicans"

5 "Another smoke break!"

4 "What was the deal with Aretha Franklin's hat?"

3 "About that tax the rich stuff -- you were joking, right?"

2 "Sir, it's refreshing to have a Chief Executive who speaks in complete sentences"

1 "Senator Craig's offering his stimulus package in the men's room"

January 27, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Ways Rod Blagojevich Can Improve His Image

10 Star in new television series, "America's Funniest Haircuts"

9 Quit politics and become a fat, lovable mall cop

8 Start pronouncing last name with Jerry Lewis-like "BLAGOOOYYYJEVICH"

7 Offer a senate seat with no money down, zero percent interest

6 Team up with John Malkovich and Erin Brockovich for hot Malkovich-Brockovich-Blagojevich sex tape

5 Change his name to Barod Obamavich

4 Safely land an Airbus on the Hudson River

3 I don't know...how about showing up for his impeachment trial?

2 Wear sexy dresses, high heels and say, "You Betcha!"

1 Uhhh...resign?

January 16, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Signs Obama's Getting Nervious

10 New slogan: "Yes we can... or maybe not, it's hard to say"

9 In moment of confusion, requested a $300 billion bailout from the bailout industry

8 He's up to not smoking three packs a day

7 Friends say he's looking frail, shaky and...no, that's McCain

6 He's so stressed, doctors say he's developing a Sanjay in his Gupta

5 Been walking around muttering, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

4 Offered Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, $100,000 to buy his old Senate seat back

3 Standing on White House roof screaming, "Save us, Superman!"

2 Sweating like Bill Clinton when Hillary comes home early

1 He demanded a recount

January 8, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Barack Obama Plans To Fix The Economy

10 Encourage tourists to throw spare change in the Grand Canyon

9 End our dependence on foreign owls

8 Sell New Mexico to Mexico

7 Put a little of that bailout money on the Ravens plus 3 at Tennessee. Come on! It's a mortal lock!

6 Rent out the moon for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs

5 Lotto our way out of this son-of-a-bitch

4 Appear on "Deal or No Deal" and hope to choose the right briefcase

3 Bail out the adult film industry -- not sure how it helps, but it can't hurt

2 Release O.J. from prison, have him steal America's money from China

1 Stop talkin' and start Obama-natin'!

January 7, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard At The Presidents' Lunch

10 "Sorry, you're not on the list, Mr. Gore"

9 "If Hillary calls, I've been here since Monday"

8 "Laura! More Mountain Dew!"

7 "You guys wanna see, 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop'?"

6 "Call the nurse -- George swallowed a napkin ring!"

5 "Hey Barack, wanna go with us to Cabo in March? Oh that's right, you have to work!"

4 "Kissey kissey"

3 "Obama? I think he's downstairs smoking a butt"

2 "Did you ever see a monkey sneezing?"

1 "I hope Clinton's unbuckling his belt because he's full"

Recent Articles Calendar

March 2010
M T W T F S S
« Feb    
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
22232425262728
293031  

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

Death To Big Media

Big Media deserves a punishing death as miserable as Dimocratic death is deserved this November. For both, Death appears to be sharpening the scythe. As noted yesterday, Keith Olbermann is close to a well deserved demise. Doom, Death, and Destruction cannot come too soon for these creeps as far as we are [...]

A Warning To Supporters Of Sarah Palin, Canada Hillary Clinton And The Tea Party Movement - As Well As Arriana Huffington

The “Divide and Conquer” ploy emerged yesterday as a stratagem to destroy the NObama Coalition. Yesterday, Big Media waved the red flag of Hillary Hate and Sarah Palin Hate to incite a “cat fight”. Some Republicans and conservatives fell for the Big Media ploy and reverted instantly to Hillary Hate. We can’t [...]

The Big Pink Diet

Rahm Emanuel, Obama’s failed attempts to devour the Hillary Clinton “machine”, Black Russian cigarettes, hate of Sarah Palin, economic collapse, everything is on the menu today.

Iran did not blow up the world yesterday. so today we will catch up on some of the news items we have not yet commented on and some [...]

'How To Work A Scam' - By Alexi Giannoulias And Elizabeth Edwards

The scam of the day is Barack Obama’s 3.834 Trillion Dollar Budget for 2011. We’ll discuss that scam on a later day. Today we will focus on Alexi Giannoulias and Elizabeth Edwards.

First, Saint Elizabeth. Elizabeth Edwards attacked Hillary and asserted her marriage was happier than Hillary’s. Bankruptcy lawyer Elizabeth Edwards participated [...]

Christmas Is Coming, The Boob Is Getting Flat

We’re not talking about his manboobs – those seem to be getting bigger. We’re making our list, checking it twice, gonna find out who’s naughty and nice.

Hillary Clinton – most assuredly – nice.

Bill Clinton – nice.

Chelsea Clinton – nice. Chelsea gets a name addition too in her future. [...]

Friday Follies: Muppets Demand Obama Birth Certificate; David Letterman’s Penis Hypocrisy; Obama Unemployment Disaster; Hillary Clinton Chills Hopium Hearts; And Obama The Boob Is Suckered And Plucked, Again – Olympic Size

Update: Congratulations Rio. We’ll play lots of this lady in coming days:

—————————————————————————–

Memories of the week are Michelle Obama dressed, like a lemon with a bow, in Copenhagen. That creepy fellow on CBS, David Letterman, confessed he is a prick.

Hillary scared the stuffing out of Obamas and sweet Muppets shouted “We’ll [...]

Days Of Atonement

On Thanksgiving Day Americans consider and reflect on the past year and give thanks for what they have received. On New Year’s Day, Americans, after consideration and reflection, look forward and plan what they wish to accomplish in 365 days.

American Jews and Jews worldwide have an additional day of reflection called Yom Kippur, the [...]

The Death-Eaters

Before insulting “bitter and clingy” Americans who oppose the health care scam Obama is pushing (”They are too irrational and, let’s face it, too ignorant”) Katha Pollitt at that Temple of Obama Love called The Nation magazine says something uncharacteristically sensible:

You see, I long to dash forward, flaming sword in hand, to champion President Obama’s [...]

Barack Obama Is The Enemy Of Health Care Reform, Part I

Wake up Democrats! Obama is and always was the enemy of health care reform. That is a hard lesson for real Democrats to accept but it has always been true.

Not only did Obama prove himself the enemy of universal health care and health care reform during the primary elections, now that [...]

Pantsuit-less Palin Provokes PINO Panic, Part II

The PINOs (Progressives In Name Only) are in a Palin Panic.

The PINOs are so desperate to bring down popular Palin they are even denouncing sexism and misogyny. The Hillary hater extraordinaire at the New York Times, Frank Rich, is so hate-filled against popular Palin that Rich even defended the object of his extraordinary hatred [...]