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February 17, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Hillary Clinton Wants To Accomplish On Her Trip Overseas

10 Exchange U.S. dollars for currency that's worth something

9 Win respect defeating Japan's top-ranked sumo wrestler

8 Shift world's perception of America from "hated" to "extremely disliked"

7 Personally thank all of her illegal campaign donors

6 Three words: stylish Indonesian pantsuits

5 Visit burial site of revered Chinese military leader, General Tso

4 Get drunk with that Japanese finance minister guy

3 Convince China to switch from lead-tainted products to mercury-tainted products

2 Catch Chinese screening of Benjamin Button entitled "The Strange Adventures of Freaky Grandpa Baby"

1 Pick up carton of duty-free smokes for Obama

February 16, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Abraham lincoln Would Say If He Were Alive Today

10 "Sup?"

9 "I see Madonna's still a slut"

8 "Who's that handsome sumbitch on the five?"

7 "Is that free Grand Slam deal still going on at Denny's?"

6 "I just changed my Facebook status update to, Tthe 'ol rail splitter is chillaxing'"

5 "How do I get on 'Dancing with the Stars'?"

4 "Okay, Obama, you're from Illinois, too. We get it!"

3 "Hey Phelps, don't Bogart the weed!"

2 "What's the deal with Joaquin Phoenix?"

1 "A Broadway play? Uhhh, no thanks. I'm good."

January 28, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard at the Meeting Between Barack Obama and the Republicans

10 "I miss the Clinton administration when we'd meet at Hooters"

9 "Can we wrap this up? I've got tickets to the 4:30 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop"

8 "Smoke break!"

7 "You fellas really need to take it easy on the Old Spice"

6 "Mr. President: don't misunderestimate the Republicans"

5 "Another smoke break!"

4 "What was the deal with Aretha Franklin's hat?"

3 "About that tax the rich stuff -- you were joking, right?"

2 "Sir, it's refreshing to have a Chief Executive who speaks in complete sentences"

1 "Senator Craig's offering his stimulus package in the men's room"

January 27, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Ways Rod Blagojevich Can Improve His Image

10 Star in new television series, "America's Funniest Haircuts"

9 Quit politics and become a fat, lovable mall cop

8 Start pronouncing last name with Jerry Lewis-like "BLAGOOOYYYJEVICH"

7 Offer a senate seat with no money down, zero percent interest

6 Team up with John Malkovich and Erin Brockovich for hot Malkovich-Brockovich-Blagojevich sex tape

5 Change his name to Barod Obamavich

4 Safely land an Airbus on the Hudson River

3 I don't know...how about showing up for his impeachment trial?

2 Wear sexy dresses, high heels and say, "You Betcha!"

1 Uhhh...resign?

January 16, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Signs Obama's Getting Nervious

10 New slogan: "Yes we can... or maybe not, it's hard to say"

9 In moment of confusion, requested a $300 billion bailout from the bailout industry

8 He's up to not smoking three packs a day

7 Friends say he's looking frail, shaky and...no, that's McCain

6 He's so stressed, doctors say he's developing a Sanjay in his Gupta

5 Been walking around muttering, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

4 Offered Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, $100,000 to buy his old Senate seat back

3 Standing on White House roof screaming, "Save us, Superman!"

2 Sweating like Bill Clinton when Hillary comes home early

1 He demanded a recount

January 8, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Barack Obama Plans To Fix The Economy

10 Encourage tourists to throw spare change in the Grand Canyon

9 End our dependence on foreign owls

8 Sell New Mexico to Mexico

7 Put a little of that bailout money on the Ravens plus 3 at Tennessee. Come on! It's a mortal lock!

6 Rent out the moon for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs

5 Lotto our way out of this son-of-a-bitch

4 Appear on "Deal or No Deal" and hope to choose the right briefcase

3 Bail out the adult film industry -- not sure how it helps, but it can't hurt

2 Release O.J. from prison, have him steal America's money from China

1 Stop talkin' and start Obama-natin'!

January 7, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard At The Presidents' Lunch

10 "Sorry, you're not on the list, Mr. Gore"

9 "If Hillary calls, I've been here since Monday"

8 "Laura! More Mountain Dew!"

7 "You guys wanna see, 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop'?"

6 "Call the nurse -- George swallowed a napkin ring!"

5 "Hey Barack, wanna go with us to Cabo in March? Oh that's right, you have to work!"

4 "Kissey kissey"

3 "Obama? I think he's downstairs smoking a butt"

2 "Did you ever see a monkey sneezing?"

1 "I hope Clinton's unbuckling his belt because he's full"

Recent Articles Calendar

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Barack Obama At Hell’s Gate, Part I

[Don't forget: Debate tonight in Austin, Texas. CNN and Univision are the hosts. 8:00 - 9:30 p.m. (ET). Join us tonight.]

Think “pet rock“. Instead of “Barack” Obama, think “pet rock” Obama.

This morning there will be a Hillary campaign phone call soliciting advice on how to deal with Barack Obama. [...]

Rezko Buys A House

As expected, February has been a tough month for the Hillary campaign. For Obama, February has been a bonanza of hilarilty.

At this late date in February 2008, Obama spokespersons and supporters prove incapable of answering simple questions about Obama “accomplishments”.

Plagiarism by Obama began, just began, to get some coverage in [...]

Deep In The Heart . . .

[Let's keep the immediate efforts focused on Wisconsin which votes today.]

Texas looms large as ever when the state votes in next months presidential primary/caucus. Many good people are working in Texas or planning to travel to Texas to help elect Hillary. We have posted contact information for Texas (and other upcoming primary states) [...]

Hillary Is 44 Money Bomb

Update:  Revised time for Wednesday event.   New Yorkers for Hillary – Make History with Senator Hillary Clinton

REVISED TIME:
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
8:00 AM
(Doors open at 7:30 AM)

Hunter College Auditorium
69th Street between Park and Lexington Avenues
New York City 

Floor seats: $250 and up
Balcony seats: $50 and $100
For more information, please contact Stephanie Sutton at ssutton@hillaryclinton.com or call 212-213-3717
—————————————————

A question [...]

The Wisconsin Heat

[Don't forget what you can do to help in Texas - read below for details]
* * *

No hotter state in the Union right now than Wisconsin. Well, maybe Hawaii. We are speaking politically of course.

Warm up in Wisconsin by helping Hillary:

On February 19, the Wisconsin primary will help decide who will become the next [...]

The REZKO Cometh, Part II

The Rezko Cometh.

Our own, appropriately named, JoeFriday reports:

During the “predictions” segment of the ‘Mclaughlin Group‘, Monica Crowley (RightWing) said:

“I now think that the trial of Tony Rezko, which is due to begin on March 3rd, will have a bigger impact on this campaign than any of us foresaw.“

According to JoeFriday, those [...]

Men O’Pause

Update II: Naomi Eskin neskin@hillaryclinton.com is in charge of out of state volunteers in Texas.

Update: Absentee Application for Ohio posted below. Information for out of state volunteers willing to assist Ohio Hillary for President – also posted.

——————————-

Previously we posted actions for Hillary supporters to do right now, today. Keep the calls, donations, emails, ground [...]

The REZKO Cometh

We have written for a long time that like all con artists, three-card monte thieves, and flim-flam men, Obama is running to keep one step ahead of the law.

Obama’s great gamble has always been that he can get the Democratic Party nomination before the trial of his benefactor and indicted slumlord friend gathers [...]

March To Victory

There are lot of things to do in February as we continue our March To Victory. Below are some actions (not words) that will change the world.

* * *

Fundraiser – New Yorkers for Hillary – Make History with Senator Hillary Clinton

Wednesday, February 20, 2008, 7:00 PM (Doors open at 6:30 PM)
Hunter College Auditorium – [...]

Valentines Day In Ohio

It’s Valentines Day. Hillary will be in the most crucial state of the last election – OHIO. This November Democrats must win Ohio – not lose it.

Once again in 2008 Ohio will be crucial for Democrats. Ohio votes on March 4, 2008. This time we need a fighter who will not be swiftboated and someone [...]