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February 17, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Hillary Clinton Wants To Accomplish On Her Trip Overseas

10 Exchange U.S. dollars for currency that's worth something

9 Win respect defeating Japan's top-ranked sumo wrestler

8 Shift world's perception of America from "hated" to "extremely disliked"

7 Personally thank all of her illegal campaign donors

6 Three words: stylish Indonesian pantsuits

5 Visit burial site of revered Chinese military leader, General Tso

4 Get drunk with that Japanese finance minister guy

3 Convince China to switch from lead-tainted products to mercury-tainted products

2 Catch Chinese screening of Benjamin Button entitled "The Strange Adventures of Freaky Grandpa Baby"

1 Pick up carton of duty-free smokes for Obama

February 16, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Abraham lincoln Would Say If He Were Alive Today

10 "Sup?"

9 "I see Madonna's still a slut"

8 "Who's that handsome sumbitch on the five?"

7 "Is that free Grand Slam deal still going on at Denny's?"

6 "I just changed my Facebook status update to, Tthe 'ol rail splitter is chillaxing'"

5 "How do I get on 'Dancing with the Stars'?"

4 "Okay, Obama, you're from Illinois, too. We get it!"

3 "Hey Phelps, don't Bogart the weed!"

2 "What's the deal with Joaquin Phoenix?"

1 "A Broadway play? Uhhh, no thanks. I'm good."

January 28, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard at the Meeting Between Barack Obama and the Republicans

10 "I miss the Clinton administration when we'd meet at Hooters"

9 "Can we wrap this up? I've got tickets to the 4:30 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop"

8 "Smoke break!"

7 "You fellas really need to take it easy on the Old Spice"

6 "Mr. President: don't misunderestimate the Republicans"

5 "Another smoke break!"

4 "What was the deal with Aretha Franklin's hat?"

3 "About that tax the rich stuff -- you were joking, right?"

2 "Sir, it's refreshing to have a Chief Executive who speaks in complete sentences"

1 "Senator Craig's offering his stimulus package in the men's room"

January 27, 2009 - David Letterman - Top Ten Ways Rod Blagojevich Can Improve His Image

10 Star in new television series, "America's Funniest Haircuts"

9 Quit politics and become a fat, lovable mall cop

8 Start pronouncing last name with Jerry Lewis-like "BLAGOOOYYYJEVICH"

7 Offer a senate seat with no money down, zero percent interest

6 Team up with John Malkovich and Erin Brockovich for hot Malkovich-Brockovich-Blagojevich sex tape

5 Change his name to Barod Obamavich

4 Safely land an Airbus on the Hudson River

3 I don't know...how about showing up for his impeachment trial?

2 Wear sexy dresses, high heels and say, "You Betcha!"

1 Uhhh...resign?

January 16, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Signs Obama's Getting Nervious

10 New slogan: "Yes we can... or maybe not, it's hard to say"

9 In moment of confusion, requested a $300 billion bailout from the bailout industry

8 He's up to not smoking three packs a day

7 Friends say he's looking frail, shaky and...no, that's McCain

6 He's so stressed, doctors say he's developing a Sanjay in his Gupta

5 Been walking around muttering, "What the hell have I gotten myself into?"

4 Offered Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, $100,000 to buy his old Senate seat back

3 Standing on White House roof screaming, "Save us, Superman!"

2 Sweating like Bill Clinton when Hillary comes home early

1 He demanded a recount

January 8, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Barack Obama Plans To Fix The Economy

10 Encourage tourists to throw spare change in the Grand Canyon

9 End our dependence on foreign owls

8 Sell New Mexico to Mexico

7 Put a little of that bailout money on the Ravens plus 3 at Tennessee. Come on! It's a mortal lock!

6 Rent out the moon for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs

5 Lotto our way out of this son-of-a-bitch

4 Appear on "Deal or No Deal" and hope to choose the right briefcase

3 Bail out the adult film industry -- not sure how it helps, but it can't hurt

2 Release O.J. from prison, have him steal America's money from China

1 Stop talkin' and start Obama-natin'!

January 7, 2000 - David Letterman - Top Ten Things Overheard At The Presidents' Lunch

10 "Sorry, you're not on the list, Mr. Gore"

9 "If Hillary calls, I've been here since Monday"

8 "Laura! More Mountain Dew!"

7 "You guys wanna see, 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop'?"

6 "Call the nurse -- George swallowed a napkin ring!"

5 "Hey Barack, wanna go with us to Cabo in March? Oh that's right, you have to work!"

4 "Kissey kissey"

3 "Obama? I think he's downstairs smoking a butt"

2 "Did you ever see a monkey sneezing?"

1 "I hope Clinton's unbuckling his belt because he's full"

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The Hillary Clinton Dynasty

Yesterday, we wrote about the increasing desperation in the hate Hillary camp of Republicans and fake “progressives”. The desperation is due to Hillary increasing her poll leads. Nicholas Kristof gave voice to that desperation in yesterday’s New York Times.

Kristof declared that if Hillary is elected after Bush we are in danger of having a dynasty established in our presidency. Bob Somersby, an Edwards supporter and publisher of Dailyhowler.com, incomparably responded that Kristof’s argument appeared to be – don’t vote for Hillary in 2008 because we (allegedly) voted for Bush in 2000.

The dynasty argument is silly on its face, but it is actually much more pernicious and sophisticated than it appears to be. The thrust of the argument as articulated by Kristoff, and echoed by the nutroots, is that if Hillary is elected for 2 terms we will then have “seven consecutive presidential terms” in which the White House “would have been in the hands of just two families.” Kristoff pleaded “If we really want a presidential dynasty, then that’s fine. But we shouldn’t back into it without discussion — for the second time in eight years.”

The origin of this “dynasty” argument, as in most things anti-Clinton, has its roots in Republican strategy. In 1994 Democrats had controlled Congress for 40 years. Newt Gingrich was determined to get as many Republicans elected as possible and end the 40 wise years in which Americans kept Republicans from controlling congress. Newt Gingrich and his rabid band of Arriana Huffingtons knew that if they were to take over the congress they needed a gimmick to get them to that majority. Newt and his Republicans came up with a truly novel idea: get rid of experienced lawmakers. They called their gimmick “term limits”.

The idea behind term limits was to blast loose as many Democrats from political office as possible and break the 40 year Democratic grip on power. Newt and the Republicans, aided by Big Media screamed for “new blood” as the solution to the nation’s problems. The aim of course was never true reform nor bringing in outsiders. The aim was Republican control of congress and the new blood was to be new Republican blood.

The Republicans in 1994 were successful. They took over the congress. Since then Republicans abandoned the call for term limits. Most of the Republicans who promised to leave office after 2 terms in office broke that pledge after they were elected. The call for term limits was hypocrisy for political advantage.

Since 1994, the Republicans, led by their “C” student George W. Bush have waged a war on experience and intelligence – for political advantage. In 1994 they won the congress by attacking experience. Bush populated his government with horse aficionado “Brownie” and the Department of Justice with graduates from religious law “schools”.

The Republican attack on experienced lawmakers for their own political advantage is now a tool employed by fake “progressives” for their political and financial advantage.

Many of the fake “progressives” picking up pitchforks to attack Hillary obviously support other candidates. The big blog owners have financial stakes in bringing Hillary down and in increasing their influence in politics. Like the 1994 Republicans screaming for “new blood” these fake progressives are interested in promoting their political power over the interests of Democratic voters.

Does the Hillary “dynasty” argument have any validity?

We do find it interesting that now that the first likely woman president is running that Republicans and fake “progressives” have discovered the evils of dynasty. Are there any functioning dynasties in America today and should they stay in business? Should we throw out these dynasties?

Lets start with the Salazar brothers in Colorodo (Colorado Democratic Senator Ken Salazar and his brother Democratic Congressman John Salazar). Should we get rid of them in the name of anti-dynasty.

What about the Kennedys? The Kennedy’s have elected a President, several senators, congressional representatives, state office holders and many others. Today, we learned that a Kennedy might challenge Congressman Chris Shays in Connecticut. Should we throw the Kennedys out in the name of anti-dynasty?

What about Democratic Senator Jay Rockefeller? The Rockefellers have elected senators and vice presidents. Off with Jay Rockefeller’s head in the name of anti-dynasty?

What about former Vice President Al Gore? He was, like his father, the Senator from Tennessee. How did Gore become VP? It surely didn’t have anything at all to do with his father the senator? Al Gore entered the presidential sweepstakes in the 1980s. Now of course the tears flow and anticipation fills the airwaves, with “why won’t Gore run?” No dynasty talk there. No, its Run Gore Run and please ignore our hypocrisy. Should we ban Al Gore from running for President in the name of anti-dynasty?

What about the Cuomos (former NY Governor Mario Cuomo and his son Attorney General Andrew Cuomo)? Should we ban the Cuomo’s from public life in the name of anti-dynasty?

What about the dynastic Udall family? The great Morris K. Udall was the congressman from Arizona. He inherited his congressional seat from his father Stewart Lee Udall in 1961. Out with Stewart and immediately in with Morris. Congressman Tom Udall is still in office. And Congressman Mark Udall is running for the Senate from Colorado. Should we ban the distinguished Udall family in the name of anti-dynasty?

Of course none of these good Democrats should be excluded from our political life. The complaints against Hillary are a political bill of attainer applicable only to her. Hypocrites.

In his confused column, Kristof’s wife counterargues “that if our aim is to open up the political system and broaden opportunity, then what better way than to elect a woman?” Kristof’s replys that “the election of a first woman loses much of its significance if she has enjoyed a political shortcut as a predecessor’s wife”. Kristof seems to be unaware that Hillary has served a full term in the senate and won reelection on her own. No, for Kristof the little lady must be discredited as only the unaccomplished wife of the man even though her life of activism goes back to before her days at Yale.

Instead of asking why the presidency has been restricted to white males of healthy incomes Kristof and fake “progressives” denigrate Hillary. Instead of asking why the female majority has never been represented at the highest level they now raise the mud bedecked argument that Hillary was merely married to a president. Why only males Kristof? Why has the political system never produced a woman president? Is there a barrier to women becoming president? These questions do not cross these fake “progressives” minds. They belittle Hillary’s accomplishments and imply she would be nowhere without her husband.

Is marriage to a political leader now the new barrier to prevent women from breaking the glass ceiling? Is this the newly minted invention to block access to the political process? As women have progressed the excuses against participation have increased. When women were finally allowed to work in offices and as teachers then those became “their” jobs. Recall when it was controversial to have women police or firefighters. Firefighters were in a life or death business and there was no room for political correctness or diversity unlike other “women” jobs. There are always great new reasons for prejudice and exclusion.

Instead of asking what it is about the political system that has excluded women from the presidency the question becomes “oh we have no problem with a woman as president it’s just that this one has the experience of having been married to an ex president.”
Meanwhile, the tears flow because poor Jeb Bush can’t run for president because his dumb brother has ruined it for him.

The “dynasty” argument of course is at best inarticulate. A dynasty must have a sequence of some consequence and some durability. Bill Clinton was the first member of his family to win elective office. Hillary Clinton was the second member of the family to win elective office. That is it for the Clinton “dynasty” – 2 officeholders. A true dynasty is the Bush family. The Bush family had Senator Prescott Bush, Congressman George H. Bush, Vice President George H. Bush, President George H. Bush, Governor George W. Bush, Governor Jeb Bush, and, President George W. Bush.

We do agree that American life would be better without the Bush family. However, Americans disagree with us and keep electing them and the courts at least once selected them. No Clinton ran for president in 2000 nor in 2004. Democrats were not inaugurated the following January. Should we hold the Clintons to blame for the fact that they seem to be the only ones capable of defeating Republicans in general and Bushes in particular? This is the central silliness at the base of the “dynasty” nonsense.

Since the Bushes won’t go away on their own, we need the Clintons to get rid of them for us.

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6 comments to The Hillary Clinton Dynasty